I Give Up

Sigh…Steam got hacked, possible encrypted CC and personal information taken. This and PSN hack make me hate the internet sometime.

I Am Scared

I’ve not written a single word toward my novel today. I am absolutely terrified. On the plus side, I started officially working. Its not much, but I’ll be working 28 hours a week. Definitely enough to get by on for now. Tomorrow night I’ll have to sit down and try to make up for the lack of writing. Part of it I think is that I just don’t know what I want to write, the other part is that maybe what I’m attempting to write isn’t any good to begin with. I’m almost tempted to just say screw it, scrap the 400 words I’ve written and plan over the next few days an actual story. I don’t think I’ll be able to just write without some sort of a plan or guideline. But I’m not quitting. I will attempt this endeavour, and I don’t care if I succeed or fail. The journey (CLICHE ALERT) is what matters in this.

Smells Like Failure

The first day isn’t even done, and I’m already regretting participating in this years NaNoWriMo. I am so unprepared for this undertaking and I don’t like where its taking me. I’ve written barely 400 words and oh lord is it bleak. My story begins with a man waking up, realising he’s miserable, and deciding to set off on a journey to end the world.

BLEAK.

I don’t know if I’m just being hateful, or what. My Protagonist just told a bunch of birds that he’s going to sing the song that ends the world. I don’t know where this story is going, or what. I already know I’m not going to finish it. It has to be a false start.

Once again, BLEAK.

I’m going to stick with it for now, but I’ll probably call this a wash before the month is through. Maybe it’ll help me work through things, or something. Ugh.

What Have I Gotten Myself Into

I really don’t know why I did this, and I know I’m going to fail. I will be participating in this year’s NaNoWriMo. For those not in the know, NaNoWriMo refers to National Novel Writing Month, which usually falls in November of each year. It is a challenge to write a 50,000 word novel in 30 days or less. I’m going into this blind. I don’t have any particular story, no characters, nothing. I will fail this. I know it, but you know what? I don’t care. I’m writing this for me, nobody else. It’ll be bad, but if I can do it, I’ll have something to be proud of.

This is actually the third time I’ve attempt to write a novel in my short 27 years of life. My first attempt was in High School, when I had planned to write a short Fantasy novel as a present for my father, based on a shared love of JRR Tolkien. I never got past the planning stages and got bogged down in the backstory of my characters. My second attempt was a few years ago, it was to be a collaboration with my buddy JD. I had wanted to go into it blind, and just write a chapter, hand it over to him, and have him react to it and so on and so forth. That failed miserably, and I know it was me who held it back. Once again I got hung up on the back story of the characters. This time, I’m going in with nothing, just an opening line.

I’m hoping that this for once doesn’t end up in failure.

What The Hell Did I Just Watch?!

So, I just finished watching tonight’s episode of Community ("Horror Fiction in Seven Spooky Steps")…Wow. That was either one of the most awesome things I’ve seen or the worst. I can’t tell which. Either way it was pure insanity, and I couldn’t stop laughing throughout.

Yeah, just watch it if you can, I can’t describe it. Wow, just wow.